Christ in all of my longings

"bright Father of light,
no turning with Thee,
let there be Christ in all of my longings.
give me oil for my dry lamp.
let me be the white bride of Your heart,
of Your heart."
team strike force, "meditation on light"

It's really hard for me to not plan out my future and determine what would make everything perfect. If I get this apartment, if my latest scheme works, if i have less of a commute, if I get a fuzzy white doggy, if my friendship with this person continues to develop, if I .... then I would be so comfortable.

When I step back and evaluate my longings, I see all of Teddy's longings. If my perfect plans worked out, not one single person would be impacted for the Kingdom's sake. Just my life would be comfier.

Will my desire to want Christ ever translate into an actual desire for Christ? I know that I want Him, but my common thoughts reveal my true motives.

For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh; for the willing is present in me, but the doing of the good is not. For the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want. But if I am doing the very thing I do not want, I am no longer the one doing it, but sin which dwells in me. I find then the principle that evil is present in me, the one who wants to do good. For I joyfully concur with the law of God in the inner man, but I see a different law in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin which is in my members. Wretched man that I am! Who will set me free from the body of this death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, on the one hand I myself with my mind am serving the law of God, but on the other, with my flesh the law of sin

book review: Same Kind of Different as Me

I tend to be skeptical of both New York Times Bestsellers and Amazing True Stories, both of which tags Same Kind of Different as Me claims. This book is, my skepticism aside, deserving of the compliments.

The prose is exquisitely beautiful. I read some books for their content and some books just because the writing is so excellent--this one has both style and content, making it well-worth the time to read. The opening chapter sucked me in, and I barely put it down until I had finished it.

The story itself was an incredible one. I give the authors some artistic license to make a true story into an interesting novel, but still, the unfolding of events was a powerful display of man's impotence and God's sovereignty.

The racial tension was revealing and humbling, especially for a northerner born in the 1980s--my understanding of racial discrimination did not entirely agree with the descriptions in the book. I appreciated the honest emotions portrayed by both main characters.

Pretty early in the book, I guessed where the story was heading--and I was right. But that did not prevent me from feeling the full emotions and from crying at the climax. It is a beautifully written book that I recommend first as an example of first-class prose, and then as an important story.

I read this book as a member of BookSneeze, a division of Thomas Nelson.

[edit] Bonus Review by Tim Challies [/edit]

if I got a tattoo

In case anyone ever has me at gunpoint and forces me to get a tattoo, I have decided what I would get. It's good to be prepared for emergencies.

It would be a little person in complete armor with the words "coram Deo" somewhere around it. But maybe a little more dignified than this guy!

If someone actually came up to me and had a gun and told me to get a tattoo or die, I would accept it as a sign from God that I am to have a tattoo. Until then, I'll just have to live coram Deo without the artwork to remind me.

book review: I am Hutterite

I Am Hutterite by Mary-Ann Kirkby is one of the most interesting, enjoyable narratives that I've read recently. Her prose is very smooth and she makes what could be boring details come alive. I loved learning about the Hutterites, and I was genuinely disappointed when the book ended. It felt like an interactive history lesson, and she made me emotionally involved in the stories of her childhood. It's a great book that I would recommend to anyone who enjoys biographies, history, and wonderful home-spun stories.

I read this book as a member of BookSneeze, a division of Thomas Nelson.

and you, vanya

There's a poem that I memorized way back in high school. It's an English translation of a Russian poem--I have no idea who wrote it or translated, and I can't seem to find it anywhere. It came out of the Russian Revolution, a time of national poverty and despair. It went along these lines:


And you, Vanya--
go and cut up that black rooster.

What for?
The little rooster sings to us at dawn.

It sure does.
But to hear it, you must be alive.
And to be alive, you must eat.

Vanya went and cut up the rooster.
Now everyone's alive,
Sitting and listening to the little hen crying,
Cackling for the rooster.




There's something so simplistically obvious about that poem.